Okay – let’s get one thing straight!
There is a saying that ‘Nice guys finish last’
Or women are drawn to ‘Bad boys’, ‘Rascals’ or even ‘Love rats’
Whilst you may believe the ‘popular opinion’ this is true, from reading the psychological tactics from PUAs or Pickup Artists, (note: read my blog on ‘Is it all about the Pickup?….’) thinking all women are subconsciously drawn to the danger they bring, is in fact, in my opinion, a myth
True, many women confess in their deepest desires, to being ‘thrilled’ at the fantasy of being with a dangerous bad boy; it is the voyeurism of the excitement and unpredictability he brings; but then they will often confess the downsides to this is the emotional pain of being at their mercy of controlling their emotions, keeping them guessing and having their hearts on an ‘emotional tight-rope’
In reality, it has been statistically proven that the majority of women prefer the safety of a pleasant, decent and honest guy – they prefer to be taken care of emotionally and that you will give them that emotional security
The trick for you is to have that self-assurance, self-confidence, self-respect and self-belief which will show her how emotionally mature you are, and how well you handle moments of crisis and adversity, and how you deal with life’s unpredictability and the difficulties that life can often bring
Whether you like it or not and whether she is fully aware of it herself, subconsciously a woman will always test you to see how much strength you have in such times of crisis
Being ‘Nice’ to her is should not be mistaken for believing you have to worship the ground she walks on, or that you are meekly dominated by her; she will instantly see this as your insecurity and weakness around her, and will reduce your “manliness” in her eyes
It is more about showing genuine interest in her, giving her compliments, respect and appreciation for her qualities, but also, showing that you too, have a voice, your own beliefs and self-worth/respect around what you stand for in your own life
When you can get this right, and understand how to be both nice yet confident in showing her who you are, then chances are, she will want to be around you, and may even look upon you as her Knight in Shining armour!
What other qualities do you believe you would need to be anassertive, yet nice – guy?
Questions, comments and feedback welcome!
